Wednesday, May 30
grrrrrrrrrr
you can never take back the words you say. especially if you say them out of anger. i just said something that wasn't kind to 2 people.. that was my natural response. i shouldn't have said that. i should have been more hospitable. but i'm just so fuming mad that he is so selfish! he doesn't care a heck about anyone. all he cares about is himself. why is it that just because i'm more accomodating then i have to accomodate? i'm not angry that i had to give it up, i'm just mad that his response to me was one that totally got me on my nerves. FUMING MAD! common sense and logic says that he should be the one giving it up, not me! serious! he says he has things to do, so do I! and he's so noisy. can't stand it. God, please help me take away the anger. who am i to judge him and criticize him? i'm just as selfish. GRRRRRRR....... AARRRHHHHH!!!!!!ok. i shall now calm myself down by thinking about better things. dinner at pepper lunch was good.. just a time of catching up with each other and talking and loving each other's presence. am also looking forward to the diving course! yay! excited! and of course looking forward to our yummy dinner this sunday... have to save up now! eat cheap and eat less! in preparation for sunday evening! heh! and i just got a msg frm someone who wants to sign up for teengames! so i'm happy too! ok... well, thinking about these things makes my fuming anger go down quite a bit. why should i waste my energy being so angry with a person who doesn't even bother that i'm angry and who is not even a bit affected by what i said. ok. i shall stop thinking about this. whatever is lovely, pure, praiseworthy, kind etc... think about such things!
help me to trust.